Enneagram Series: Sarah’s Story As An Enneagram Nine

Hey everyone,
I have some pretty big news today! My good friend Sarah Gittens has graciously agreed to contribute to my series on the Enneagram and she has shared below what it is like to be an Enneagram Nine!
Sarah was one of the first friends that I met at my church and she is without a doubt one of the sweetest, wisest, and most genuine souls you could ever care to meet. She is also low-key an expert on all things Enneagram—making her the perfect person to help me out with this series! So without further ado, here is Sarah’s post!
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What do you want?
I’m guessing the vast majority of you have an immediate response. 1) A latte to wake up. 2) A life partner to wake up with. 3) A raise or a new job. 4) A better phone or 5) A new pair of jeans that make your butt look good. 6) All of the above. I’m quite certain that most of you can answer, without hesitation, regardless of how you approach the question.
If you’re a nine, you most likely paused. You probably thought about what the person is really asking. Considered all possible answers and the various outcomes of those answers that would fall on the ears of anyone listening. You’ve wondered how vulnerable you can be or even want to be. You’ve wondered how it would make them feel? How they might respond? How will it impact this moment or future moments? You may even have an answer but instead:
Image result for your presence matters


*Responds to a question with a question
“I don’t really know.”
“I’m good with whatever.”
[insert whatever you think is safe to say]
As a nine, I am easy going, generally content, interested, happy to listen, patient, a day dreamer, accepting, a natural mediator, passionate, and I value others. I am also avoidant, people pleasing, procrastinating and have lived most of my life unaware of my inability to value one person: myself.
The truth? I DO know what I want. The problem? The answer has always been buried by a million thoughts of what you and you and you want. Does what you want clash with what I want? How would you feel? Would you feel insecure, happy for me, upset with me or jealous? How would you respond? Would you judge me, be kind or discard me? We know what we want.. but what we want has become lost or buried.
We have sometimes called the Nine the crown of the Enneagram because it is at the top of the symbol and because it seems to include the whole of it. Nines can have the strength of Eights, the sense of fun and adventure of Sevens, the dutifulness of Sixes, the intellectualism of Fives, the creativity of Fours, the attractiveness of Threes, the generosity of Twos, and the idealism of Ones. However, what they generally do not have is a sense of really inhabiting themselves—a strong sense of their own identity.
When I started reading the above paragraph, I loved it. When I hit the last sentence I hated it. I hated it because I knew it was true. When I went away to college, I realized I didn’t know myself and I spent the next several years trying to find who I was, what I liked, and why I liked it. I didn’t realize how often I stayed silent and when I did speak up I said things I heard rather than believed or felt. I was in there, but I had fallen asleep. I thought I had made so much progress and maybe in certain areas I had…
Awakening. This is how I would describe the time since I learned I was a nine in July of 2018. The enneagram reminded me that I matter and yes, I know I matter. I have grown up in church. I know Jesus loves me. I can quote Psalm 139. I can tell you with tremendous conviction that YOU matter, YOU are loved, and YOU are believed in. I know I matter but do I know? Do I believe it?
We will always be a work in progress, but asking myself what I want has been both liberating and terrifying. It has made me more vulnerable to the negative emotions that accompany disappointment, but has also been a catalyst for practicing genuine gratitude. My ability to reframe negative situations into positive emotions is a wonderful gift, but too often I settled for a facade of peace. I settled for the background [of my own life] even though I matter [as much as the next person] to receive love, be seen, and achieve success. Courage may look a bit different for everyone, but for me, it has been actively believing and praying for things I had let die, fade or been too afraid to want.
I don’t think I’ll ever possess the natural self confidence I admire in others. I used to want it. I tried to emulate it. However, I’ve noticed that my motivation has never been from a place of self confidence (because it never actually comes), but I will act from a place of conviction. In the midst of all this self reflection is a realization that I need to believe I matter and have value. A knowledge won’t suffice, rather I need that seed of truth to take root. It is in this truth, “I matter,” that this 9w1 day dreamer is free to hope again. Free from the weight of doing or being what others expect. Free to ask herself, “what do I want?”
To [me and] my fellow 9s: You can be happy even when others aren’t happy for you, because your happiness matters. You can be upset when you’re mistreated, because your feelings matter. You can speak up, because your thoughts, opinions and the many perspectives you effortlessly see all matter. You do not have to hide or diminish for the benefit of anyone else because your presence matters. Actually, we benefit when you don’t hide. We benefit when you speak up. We shine better when you shine. You are not selfish for wanting anything, because you matter. So tell us, what do you want?

If you know your Enneagram number, and would like to contribute a post for this series, please contact me at courtneymwhitaker@gmail.com or shoot me a DM @authorcourtney1 on Instagram. I can’t wait to hear your stories

Identity – A Guest Post

Hey everyone,

Today I am excited to announce that I have a special guest post brought to you by a good friend, and all-around awesome human-being, Evan Krause. 

Some of you reading this may already know Evan, but for those of you who don’t, Evan has been working for about a year with a Christian missions group called the Circuit Riders and with a national tour called Carry The Love. Last month he had the chance to work with The Send—a Christian revival that has been called the ‘Jesus Movement‘ of this generation and he’s without a doubt one of the strongest Christians I know.

He has some powerful words about finding our identity in Christ and living in the freedom that God intended us to have! 

I promise you will be blessed by it and even if you are not Christian, I pray that you will still take a couple of minutes out of your day to watch this video! You won’t regret it! 

If you have any thoughts you would like to share, please leave a comment below! As always, I’d love to hear what you have to say! 

Guest Post – Because He Is, I Am

Hey guys,

So…I have some good news and some good news (you were expecting me to say good news and bad news, weren’t you?)! The first piece of good news is that my life is finally getting back to normal and I should be back to my regular posts next week! The second piece of good news is…this week’s post was written by my good friend and sister in Christ, Julia Carvalho! 

Julia and I met back in April at a Bible study at my church and she’s legit one of the coolest people that I know! She also has a lot of wisdom – so I’d strongly advise you read on! You won’t regret it!

So…let’s all give a big round of virtual applause for Julia! 

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It is only when I know who God is, that I know who I am and discover the purpose and calling that God has placed upon my life.

“’But what about you?’” Jesus asked. ‘Who do you say that I am?’

Simon Peter answered, ‘You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.’

Jesus replied, ‘Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah…And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hell will not overcome it.’” (Matthew 16:15-18).

So, who do I say that Jesus is? He is gracious and compassionate. He is holy and awesome. The works of His hands are faithful and just; all His precepts are trustworthy. He is good. He is love. He is my anchor when life gets rocky. He is my mountain, my safe place. He is my fountain of living water. He is light—shining into the darkest parts of my life. He is peace. He is joy. He is patient, even when I make the same mistake over and over and over again. He is my shield, my refuge. He is my Savior—bearing my burdens daily. He is with me, holding my hand in every moment. He is my king, my friend, my father.

And because I know who He is, I know who I am. Because He is my father, I am His child and I reflect His image. Because He is strong, I am strong. Because He is peace, I am filled with peace. Because He is a leader, I can lead in confidence knowing that He is going ahead and paving the way for me. Because He is brave, I am brave. Because He is a rock, I am a rock—stable, unwavering, faithful. Because He is patient, I am patient. Because He is beautiful, I am beautiful. Because He is confident in who He is, I am confident in who I am and who He created me to be. Because He is, I am.

And it’s in the quiet moment when I am declaring who He is, and I am being reminded of who I am, that He whispers to the depths of my soul my purpose, my calling. It’s a path that only I can walk. A calling that only I can fit into. A purpose that only I can fulfill, because He has created it uniquely for me, just as He has created a unique purpose just for you.

So, who do you say He is?

Scriptures referenced:

Psalm 11:4,7,9; Psalm 34:8; 1 John 4:8; 1 John 1:5; 2 Peter 3:9; Psalm 68:19-20; Isaiah 26:3; Psalm 36:8-9; Colossians 3:15; 1 Peter 5:7; 1 Peter 1:8-9; Romans 15:13; Matthew 16:13-20; Mark 10:46-52


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If you want to hear more awesomeness from Julia, be sure to check out her vlog, Jewels From Jules! Just click through the link below and subscribe to her channel! I promise that you’ll love it!😃




Hey everyone, big news! My Mom, Saved By Grace2009, wrote a guest post for my site! Because she is older than many of my readers, I decided to ask her to write it on wisdom. I believe that she has a lot of wisdom and she did a great job with the topic! So, without further ado, here is my mom’s post! 😊


First I wanted to thank my daughter Courtney for graciously inviting me to Guest Blog. I was immensely humbled when Courtney asked me to write on the topic of “Wisdom”

Subsequently, I have been praying about this for quite sometime and therefore a little late in completing this ~ please forgive me

As Courtney’s mom, I am much older and therefore I have experienced and learned a lot over the years I have walked on this earth. Therefore, I am always happy to help others by sharing what I have gleaned in my life and share the knowledge the Lord has graciously bestowed upon me.

However, I have been abundantly blessed because the Lord has placed the most amazing individuals in my life who took the time to bless me with their words of wisdom.

When I think of wisdom, like you the first person to come to my mind is Solomon.

Therefore I went back and read Solomon’s prayer and I learned a lot about wisdom as he was very transparent and it was obvious the attributes he possessed when asking the Lord to give him wisdom.

Solomon’s Prayer

Then Solomon said, “You have shown great lovingkindness to Your servant David my father, according as he walked before You in [b]truth and righteousness and uprightness of heart toward You; and You have [c]reserved for him this great lovingkindness, that You have given him a son to sit on his throne, as it is this day.Now, O Lord my God, You have made Your servant king in place of my father David, yet I am but a little child; I do not know how to go out or come in. Your servant is in the midst of Your people which You have chosen, a great people who are too many to be numbered or counted. So give Your servant [d]an understanding heart to judge Your people to discern between good and evil. For who is able to judge this [e]great people of Yours?”

Let’s unpack Solomon’s prayer to the Lord …

First, Solomon praised God for all He had done in the life of his father, David.

I believe wisdom is continuing to praise God every day and not forgetting all the ways the Lord has worked in our lives. Praising Him for the big and little things He orchestrates for our good.

Second, we can see that Solomon loved the Lord and trusted Him. Therefore wisdom is expressing our love to the Lord and trusting Him with our lives. This is not always easy to do because we can only see the here and now but putting our life completely in the hands of the Lord and trusting Him in all situations, Also, remember you are His masterpiece, fearfully & wonderfully made in His image. The Lord loves you and He does have a plan for your life. In the good times and bad … wisdom is loving and trusting the Lord with all your heart and not relying on your own understanding.

Thirdly, we see that Solomon is grateful for the position that he holds here on earth. Solomon realizes and understands that without the Lord he would have nothing. Everything we are and all that we have comes from the Lord.

Next, wisdom is” asking” the Lord to supply you with “wisdom” specifically what you need to know and understand to make an impact here on earth for His glory. I believe courage would be added to that as well because having the knowledge is the beginning and then partaking in the action that follows is crucial.

Lastly, we can see that Solomon is humble. I believe humbling ourselves is where wisdom begins. We cannot begin to gain wisdom or knowledge without humility.

Humility is not a common character trait we often see but I believe if we truly want to gain wisdom then we need to humble ourselves.

To conclude, every day is a new experience. When we begin the day clothed in humility, read our Bible to gain knowledge, and courageously do what we know is right in the eyes of the Lord … loving Him and praising Him. Then I believe the Lord will bless us with wisdom.

If we ask the Lord … He will answer ….

Sometimes wisdom is gleaned through living life and other times I believe we can humbly ask the Lord to give us the wisdom we need in our life.

God bless you always !


Hey everyone, my good friend Mfon from Dainty M. just submitted an awesome article that I think you guys will love! It’s the first of many guest posts that I plan to have here, so keep your DMs open and regularly check your inboxes! I plan to have more guest posts in the future! 


I watched this movie ‘The choice’ and I think it was pretty good. Though my over analytical mind kept asking questions and trying to solve an unknown mystery. Lol. Suffice to say, everything we do in life hinges on our choices. Each choice has pros and cons. If you’re like me, you probably have the pros and cons list where you weigh every option. But even with that obsessive need for perfection, we still make mistakes!
So yes, choices are important. And God liberally gave us the chance to choose. We get to choose life or death, happiness or sadness, black or white. And sometimes these distinctions won’t be so clear- like picking between different shades of grey for instance. It gets really tricky and we need God even more!

I watched a romantic movie today from Hallmark. I like Hallmark movies, clean and brilliant! So yeah I had the whole ‘coil up on my carpet and eat chips’ moment while watching the fairytale unfold and letting out the ‘awws’ and ‘I want that!’. Well there you have it, I’m a hopeless romantic. Lol. So after the movie I went all whiny to God like ‘would I ever have that perfect love relationship?’ Long story, I decided to look at Ruth in the Bible. And I found something interesting.

She made choices. First was to follow her mother in law even when she knew there was nothing left for her. Second, she didn’t just sit home as a sad widow, she chose to go get a job. Third, she chose to follow her mother in-law’s instructions of making the right move. Starting from there, I probably wouldn’t have done that cause I always expect the guy to make the first move. Then secondly, why go out when you can just stay home depressed at how unfair life is? And yeah, I also may not have followed Naomi knowing she had no sons left.

So what if she hadn’t taken the job offer and rather wandered to other fields to glean? What if she hadn’t even followed Naomi? We probably wouldn’t be reading about her in the Bible.

Choices are so powerful!

Eve chose to eat the apple… Adam also chose to eat it. No one forced them.  There could be some convincing and nudges here and there but at the end, we get to choose. God has given us this chance to choose but He tells us to choose right.

I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live- Deut 30:19

I’d like us to get a little more cautious about the choices we make every single day. Most of these choices have ripple effects and they flow down a long time.

I pray the Holy Spirit guides us as we make choices.