Tag: Faith

In Dependence

Courtney13 Comments

I have a confession to make: 

I’m a recovering independent. 

From the time I was a little girl, I’ve always been determined to rely on myself and never, ever ask for help with anything. I had four favorite words as a child—always in the same order.

“I’ll do it myself.” 

As I’ve gotten older, this symptom has only seemed to grow more severe.

Perhaps it’s a by-product of the thousands of self-help/self empowerment messages I’ve absorbed over my lifetime, an extremely perfectionistic personality, or the fear of depending on others. More than likely, it’s a combination of all of the above. Sometimes, this translates into positive character traits such as a good work ethic and healthy sense of independence. Other times, my self-relience becomes a vice. It can cause me to become stubborn, avoiding asking for help—even from the One who we’re called to lean on in times of need.

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This year, I feel like God is slowly trying to break this vice, helping me to rely more on Him and less on myself. Most of you know that this is my first year of college, but one thing that some of you may not know is that I was homeschooled K-12.

I wasn’t anti-social, sheltered, or otherwise freakish during my school years, but prior to 2016, I was in classes where the majority of my classmates shared my faith. I still saw and dealt with many of the same struggles that people in public/private schools deal with, but I was accustomed to being surrounded by fellow believers in my homeschool classes (Yes, many homeschoolers do take classes outside of the house). I had what many people would consider a “small town experience”. I knew most of my teachers before I took classes with them and grew up with a lot of the same kids all the way through school.

Oftentimes, I took the comforts of familiarity for granted, not realizing how comfortable I have become in the same building, with the same students for so many years. Now, I barely know anyone at college and I’m in a secular environment for the first time.

The rug of familiarity has been pulled out from underneath me.

Nonetheless, through all of this, I believe that God is trying to make me stronger and more reliant on Him. No longer can I depend on myself, familiarity, or the comfort of being surrounded by fellow Christians. When I’m alone and uncertain at college, I have to depend solely on God – trusting that He’ll give me the strength I need to get through the day. 

To quote Julian, a fellow blogger friend, I need to “Frog it“—in other words, Fully Rely On God. There are times that we can’t fully rely on ourself in this world. In a world where Christians are becoming more the minority every day, crime and death runs rampant, and a thousand choices lay before our eyes, we need to keep our eyes on one thing and one thing only—Jesus. He’s the only one big enough to help us through all of life’s ups and downs.

If you’re also a recovering independent, I urge you to sink into Jesus and give Him the steering wheel. It may be scary, but in the end, He’s the one that can sustain us and carry us through this rapidly spinning world. We need Him in every breath and every moment.

We need to FROG it, fully relying on a God who knows us in our weakness and strength, our doubt and confidence, and every moment of our life. God has entrusted us with this life that we’re living. 

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The question that we have to answer is this: Will we trust God? 

This is what the Lord says:

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
    who draws strength from mere flesh
    and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
That person will be like a bush in the wastelands;
    they will not see prosperity when it comes.
They will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
    in a salt land where no one lives.

“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
    whose confidence is in him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
    that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
    its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
    and never fails to bear fruit.”

Jeremiah 17:5-8

Diary Of A Christian College Student: Chapter Three

Courtney9 Comments

Dear Diary,

They say there’s a season for everything.

A time to laugh, and a time to cry.

A time to be born, and a time to die.

A time to weep, and a time to laugh

A time to mourn, and a time to dance.*

In high school, it was a time of everything predictable. I’ve been around pretty much the same people since grade school. I knew the hallways as well as I knew my own home. I alternated between ordering the same three meals every day at lunch. It was a time when we were not-quite-kids and not-quite-adults. It may have had it’s confusions, but movies told us what to expect. It was a time of finding ourselves, a time for developing lifelong friendships, and a time for feeling things intensely, as if for the first time.

College, on the other hand, is a time of change. Nothing is the same anymore.

The hallways feel a million miles away from the halls of Holy Cross high school—cold and sterile. Lacking any sense of familiarity. With the exception of Dana, Nathan, and TJ, I haven’t spotted one familiar face. I may not have been friends with everyone at my old school, and it may have had it’s share of cliquey-ness and cattiness, but I could tell you the name of nearly every kid I passed in the hallways. These were kids that I went to school with from kindergarten to 12th grade. I knew what to expect. Now, it’s like a whole other culture.

On my first day here, I heard the F-Bomb dropped about ten times, in the presence of our professors. Sure, some of the students cursed at Holy Cross – that’s to be expected nearly everywhere. But never words like that, and never in the presence of teachers. If one of the adults at Holy Cross heard one of the students talking like that, they would have sent them on their way to the principal’s office in a second. The rules were strict and pretty obvious as to what you could-and-couldn’t get away with there.

Not to mention that there were about as many different kinds of lifestyles and beliefs among the students as there were students themselves. No longer were there moral absolutes – things that everyone knew to wrong. Things that were scandalous and gossiped about at Holy Cross were spoken about in broad daylight at Westside Oak. Nothing was off limits.

Perhaps the strangest thing was the student-teacher interactions. At Holy Cross, my teachers knew the name of every student in their classroom. They all shared a common faith and I could look to them not only as teachers – but as mentors and role models. Most of them were kind and seemed like they really wanted to be there, desiring to help each of us live up to our potential. As hardworking student who put her all into her work, I got along with nearly all of my teachers. Even instructors who taught subjects I struggled in were patient and happy to help me understand concepts that were difficult to me. Now, I’m lucky if my teachers even know my name.

One teacher in particular seems ready to stand in the face of all I believe in. My college english teacher asked on the first day who was Christian. Slowly but surely, I raised my hand, along with a handful of other students, uncertain of what she was doing.

“Alright.” She said, looking as if it was anything but alright. “You have your faith – that’s fine. But, in this class, I hope this won’t hinder you from being open minded to the reading material. We’re going to be reading a lot of different viewpoints. Not all of them will be consistent with fundamentalism. Most of them won’t be.”

Already uncomfortable with the way she was referring to my faith, I shifted in my seat, trying to figure out what she meant by that. She than went on to explain class procedure, as if to distract from that weird paragraph she just uttered. Finally, she handed us our first assignment – a short academic essay. My stomach churned as I read it – an explicit reflection an erotic encounter.

Was this really allowed in a classroom? Could they hand out something so full of filth to the students without any consequences? There was no way I would ever pick up something like this on my own, yet here I was, stuck reading it in school – of all places! I guess the shock on my face showed, as I stared blankly at the writing, because my teacher soon walked over to my desk.

“Ms. Bennett, are you doing alright there?”

I glanced up, trying to look less uncomfortable than I felt. I nodded my head quickly, hoping this moment would soon fade to the past. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Alright, I just want to make sure you can handle this class – that it’s not to hard for you.”

My face burned with frustration. Too hard for me? I was an AP student in my high school and made straight A’s in all four years of English! My dream was to become a journalist and write professionally. This was not “too hard” for me.

Although I suspected that she had a very different meaning in her words. It was a challenge; a dare.

A challenge I was willing to accept.

There’s no way I’m dropping there’s class now. I’m not going to prove my teacher right – that I can’t handle this. After all, I’ve always been a strong person. Right?

“No, it’s not too hard for me. I’m fine.”

I had just told my teacher that I could indeed handle this – no matter how horrible it may be. I told her I was strong enough to do it, even though it’s possible that my answer stemmed more from pride. I had made my declaration. I was strong and capable.

The only question was, did I believe it myself?

*Ecclesiastes 3

All The Single (Christian) Ladies

Courtney8 Comments

Hey everyone, happy Sunday! Today I’m posting an awesome guest blog by the wonderful Emily from Fearfully Wonderfully Me! Her posts are awesome and very inspiring, so be sure to check them out! 😊

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There are a whole lot of blog posts and articles online that discuss life as a single lady from a Christian perspective. However, it seems the topics are always about three common themes:

A) Knowing when the right man is coming along

b) How not to focus on dating while waiting for this man

c) Trying to figure out God’s will for your life while you pray to not become a lonely woman with a lot of cats.

Although I may be exaggerating these points a little bit, we all know it’s true. There just seems to be something missing from these articles. Although I’m sure God has a wonderful husband planned for me (and yes, I still want a lot of cats too), I want to know what to do in my single life right now. I want practical advice that I can put into effect immediately, and if you’re reading this, I’m sure that is your desire as well.

Well guess what? The Word of God has the answer we’re looking for! Although I never saw the New Testament as much of a guide to living life as a single Christian woman, there’s actually a whole passage dedicated to us in Luke 2.

In verses 36­-38, we read about the prophetess Anna, a widow of almost 84 years. You might be asking, what does an old widow have to do with my single years? A lot actually. Anna was only married seven years (verse 36), so while she knew what it was like to be a wife, she had way more experience with the single life. More importantly, Anna’s life was a reflection of how our lives should look right now.

 

Here are the three acts of Anna that led her to a victorious single life.

Abiding

…and this woman was a widow of about eighty­four years, who did not depart from the temple…(Luke 2:37 NKJV)

Anna never left God’s temple. She prayed and fasted constantly. She was always abiding in her Lord’s presence. Now I’m not saying you have to chain yourself to your church doors, but we need to realize the importance of abiding in Christ.

Since Jesus lives in our hearts, we can do this anywhere. We need to make it a priority to put Jesus first in our lives and seek alone time with Him always throughout our day. This is how we build a solid foundation in our faith.

Serving

…but served God with fastings and prayers night and day (Luke 2:37).

The key word here is serving. Anna clearly had a servant’s heart. She was a prophetess, so she prayed and spoke the Word of God to people. We all have different gifts, and it’s important that we use our single years to cultivate these gifts and develop a servant’s heart.

It does not matter if you are younger or older; God can use your passions to do amazing things. We just need to be ready to serve Him in both big and small ways.

Proclaiming

And coming in that instant she gave thanks to the Lord, and spoke of Him to all those who looked for redemption in Jerusalem (Luke 2:38).

When Anna found out about the birth of her Savior, she didn’t waste any time. She told everyone about Jesus. Anyone who was lost or broken who ended up at the temple would hear the Gospel from Anna.

How many lost souls have you told about Jesus? How many broken people have you loved with the grace of God? I know I haven’t done enough, but it’s something I try to work on everyday. Anna’s life mission was to glorify her savior, and it should be our mission as well.

So now, my beautiful friends, you know how to live your single years to their fullest by abiding, serving, and proclaiming. This is a life that is dedicated to worshipping and pleasing God, doing your best to honor Him with your whole heart and soul.

This is really how every Christian should live­­ single or married. This is the purpose of every child of the Most High King. And as single women, no matter what our age, our lives should be a shining example of God’s marvelous love and grace.

Love, Emily.

I’m Emily, owner and blogger at FearfullyWonderfullyMe.com. Jesus is my life, and writing is my passion. I strive to inspire young women through faith and fashion.

The Future Of Our Faith: By Ron J. Sider and Ben Lowe

Courtney4 Comments

Hey everyone, sorry I haven’t posted in a while! I promise to get better about that moving forward! 

A couple of months back, I read a book called The Future of Our Faith by Ron J. Sider. and Ben Lowe. This book is an “intergenerational conversation on critical issues facing the church“, and throughout this book, we see commentary on important social issues through the eyes of a baby-boomer and a millennial.

Ron J. Sider is seventy-six years old, a professor at Palmer Theological Seminary, and the author of over ten books, including Living Like Jesus, Just Politics: a Guide for Christian Engagement, Churches That Make A Difference, etc. He is passionate about social justice and has been working within the Christian community for years to help Christians better engage with the world around them.

Ben Lowe is a Christian author (Green Revolution, Doing Good Without Giving Up, and The Future of Our Faith) and Senior Advisor with Young Evangelicals for Climate Action. He has worked in the Christian community to try to raise more awareness for Biblical environmentalism and once ran for congress in 2010.

Reading this book, it’s clear that both authors have done a lot of research on trends and problems facing the modern day church. Deeply frustrated with our current dysfunctional patterns, they strive to pave a new way forward in our approaches to topics like race, wealth, homosexuality, politics, gender equality, the environment, social sin vs. personal sin, divorce, etc.

The chapters are broken up into nine chapters, each addressing a separate topic. They’re both well-researched in different stances on important issues and strive to present their views with sensitivity and grace—especially on some of the more controversial topics. They don’t always stick with popular opinion and are quick to call out dysfunction when needed, but they always remain Biblical and stick to God’s Word as their number-one-source.

The Future of Our Faith remains relevant throughout, and addresses some of the very questions that we’re asking as a Christian society right now in a very nonpartisan way—avoiding siding completely with either political party. It avoids focusing on legislation and is more concerned with how we, as the Body of Christ, operate in the world around us. I appreciated this, as I believe that the current hyper-political atmosphere of the church is damaging our witnessing and making the us look bad.

At the end of each chapter, each author comments on the other’s points, and despite the extremely wide age gap, they tend to wholeheartedly agree with each other’s perspective. It was clear that they each valued the other’s opinions and appreciated the unique perspectives of their counterpart.

Personally, I believe that every Christian should read this, as the choices that we make at this point of history have the potential to shape the “future of our faith” (No pun intended). The authors have an excellent and consistent worldview and present a positive framework for how we can move forward in a changing world. It was easily one of the most insightful books that I’ve read in a long time.

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To conclude, I would easily give this book a five-out-of-five stars and I’d highly recommend it to any Christian interested in engaging Biblically with the world around them. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Reflections On College

Courtney4 Comments

“It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.”-C. S. Lewis

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The first week of school is always an interesting time. With this season comes new teachers, new classmates, and at times—a new school. College, I’ve found, contains all of this and more.

As I walked through the glass doors of college last Tuesday, the realization came in full force that this was my first time in a secular environment. I had a Christian education all the way through school, so most of my interactions up until now have been with fellow believers. And, as much as I’ve joked about some of the interesting customs of Christian subculture (e.g. “testamints” are actually a thing), I’ve come to find that there really is something special about being surrounded by other believers.

Thankfully, no one has been hostile about my faith (I honestly thought they were going to confiscate my cross earrings on the first day), but it’s also common knowledge that faith is not a normal conversation topic. Knowing about all of the hip Christian singers and bands gets you virtually no brownie points from fellow classmates in college. For the first time, I’m faced with the challenge of being “In the world, but not of it”.

I’m still trying to figure out what this looks like in real life.

Nonetheless, I believe everything happens for a reason. I’ve learned a lot over the course of high school and I believe that now God wants to teach me something new. He has each one of us in our current life situations for a reason. Even Jesus couldn’t stay in His hometown forever if He wanted to make an impact—He had to venture out in to the world around Him. In the words of an old Kelly Clarkson song “I’ll spread my wings and I’ll learn how to fly. I’ll do what it takes until I touch the sky.” In order to fly, I must first jump, using my faith as wings to guide me through new and unfamiliar territory. 

If you’re at a new school, a new work place, or like me, starting college for the first time, I want to encourage you to cling tightly to God and step into His will with courage and bravery. He has us where we are for a reason. If we had stayed in elementary school our whole lives, imagine how much we would have missed out on! We grow through new experiences, new people, and new places.

I don’t know how God’s going to use me in college or what this season will look like, but I trust that He’ll guide me through this process. I have officially decided to make Joshua 1:9 my “verse-of-the-year“.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

I may be in a new stage of life, but I know that I’m not alone in it. Just because my school isn’t ‘Christian‘ doesn’t mean that God isn’t there. He’s with me in those very hallways, within the walls of each one of my classes. God may push us out of our comfort zone, but He will never leave us alone. He is our strength and our shield, making us warriors ready for anything that comes our way. 

If God brings you to it, He’ll give you the strength to get through it—and thrive in the midst of it. If we take one day at a time, and trust God with every moment, we can rise to any occasion and grow in our faith. 

“Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.” Ephesians 6:13-18.

 

Living In The Quiet

Courtney4 Comments

Hi everyone, sorry for the longtime hiatus. Things have kind of been a little crazy for me lately with post-grad drama and working on a book that I hope to publish, but I’m going to try to be more faithful with my blog in the future. In short, it feels good to be back. 😊

. . .

I’ll be honest, I’m an extravert. I’m not necessarily a loud or overly-out-there-extravert, but I’m an extravert nonetheless. To many, I would probably look more like an introvert, due to the fact that I prefer someone else to lead the conversation, but get energized around people, qualifying me for that title.

That being said, I love being around people and hearing the joys-and-noises of life; silence is basic my worst enemy. I typically have music playing, a book in hand, or a TV show on. Sometimes I even do a couple of those things at once.

Yes, I’m a millennial.

I enjoy stimuli, and I believe that in some ways, this tends to bleed into my life. As an author at heart, I tend to long for grand moments, the kind that you wait for at the end of a novel. I’ve had a couple of those types of moments this year, but as the year has closed, and summer has crept upon me, I’ve kind of found myself going crazy, battling more OCD than usual.

But, I believe God is trying to teach me something in the midst of it; He’s teaching me how to live in the calm, live in the ordinary. The crazy thing about life, is that it keeps going. Movies close with credits and maybe outtakes, but life continues, making it unparalleled to most forms of media. Furthermore, while we might easily find songs about self-discovery, changing the world, or finding love, we rarely lyrics about eating a sandwich or emptying the dishwasher. Recently, I read a book called Simply Tuesday by Emily P. Freeman, which really resented with this part of me. She does a beautiful job at tackling the challenge of living in the silence, and one quote stands out in particular.

“What gives moments meaning is not the moments themselves but the presence of Christ with us in the midst of them.”

God is alive in every moment.

Not just the mountain tops.

Not just the bucket list items.

Not just the walking-on-sunshine-moments.

Each and every moment of life.

God is alive in the most unusual, hilarious conversations with your friend. God is alive as you brush your teeth in the morning. God is alive in the moments of concentration, trying to find the perfect sentence for that novel or essay.

God is alive in the silence as much as He’s alive in the excitement. This is something that I’m still learning, but I’m believing it more with each sentence that I type. God is still God, from the peaks of Mount Sinai to the lights of New York City to the calm of a small town. He’s working in your life even during the times that feel most silent. God is too sovereign to confine Himself only to big moments. He is alive both the noise and the silence, wherever you find yourself right now.

God is here. In your life. In mine. In each and every moment that we breathe.

And because of this, we can find peace when living in the quiet. Because whether our current life situation feels big or small, God is bigger than it all.❤️