Category: Bible Commentary

How To Cope With Heartbreak

Courtney3 Comments

This post may seem like somewhat of a downer at first sight, in light of the fact that one of the most relationship-y holidays is on the horizon. Nonetheless, recently God has put it on my heart to address those who may be struggling through this Valentines Day. Thus, I put together some tips that I believe are helpful with sort of thing and wrote a post for all of those who are dealing with a lost relationship (or crush) this Valentines Day.

Valentines day can be one of the worst days of the year if you’re going through a recent heartbreak. Everywhere you look, there are candy hearts, gifts for your significant other, and too many cards to count. Combined with the fact that after a heartbreak, everything seems to remind you of them, this is a very bad combo.

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Though, like I’ve admitted before, I’ve never been in a relationship, I have dealt with heartbreak in the past. It’s ignored or forgotten too often in society, but sometimes a crush gone wrong can cause the same sensation. There were real feelings involved and somewhere along the way, they got squashed. Stomped on. Broken.

It’s a feeling that can feel almost like an illness. Your stomach hurts, your throat feels swollen, and you don’t want to move out of your bed. You listen to Taylor Swift songs on a loop, as the situation goes from “sad, beautiful, tragic” to hating on his “stupid old pickup truck” (If you’re a Taylor Swift fan, you saw what I did there😉). You feel like you’ll never recover. You do, but you certainly never forget. Even years later, you’ll still remember the sound of their voice and meaningless details about them, but that’s OK. It’s a part of your past, and those who don’t know their history are doomed to repeat it.

Because heartbreak is such a universal topic—and ever so relevant around this time of the year, I decided to write a post about it, and give some advice on how to get through it.

Pray about it 

This is something that, admittedly, I didn’t do enough during my times of heartbreak. I journaled about it. Boy, did I journal about it! As a writer, my journals were the first thing I ran to when I faced heartache and my first one got quite a bit of air time, looking back. Nonetheless, I believe I may have healed quicker if I had prayed for God to take the pain away. As embarrassing and painful as heartbreak can be, God already knows about it, and as our friend, He’s a safe person to talk about this kind of thing with. I tell my earthly best friend practically everything, so why not do the same with our Heavenly friend and Savior?

Let yourself Rest

Going through heartbreak can be physically exhausting. One of the most tempting things during this time is to turn into a vegetable—lying in bed in sweats and watching too many episodes of Gilmore Girls. We should never remain in this position, but it’s OK to give yourself a break. You’ve been through a lot and your body needs time to recover just as much as your heart. Be nice to yourself during this time and give yourself a little thing we as Christians like to call grace.

Be wise

Thankfully, during the times that I went through heartbreak, I didn’t have social media. If I did, I’m almost positive I would have at least been tempted to pull the “social media stalking trick“. But please do yourself a favor—don’t do it! Looking at their pictures and status updates is only going to make this thing a hundred times worse. You don’t need to give this person that much thought. They’re a part of your past, and right now, your job is to find your way into the future. Which brings me to point #4.

Focus On Other Things

You don’t need another person to make you happy. The only one who can fill the emptiness that often accompanies heartbreak is Jesus. Turn to Him! Read your Bible, and maybe some good books. Hang out with some friends. Take up a hobby. Too often, we can make a person into an idol, and let them take up the place that only God should have. Never forget that another person doesn’t complete you—God does.

Allow yourself to remember and move on

The truth is, if the relationship/crush/person was significant enough, you’re never going to entirely forget about them. From time to time, you’ll wonder what ever happened to them and who they became. That’s OK. Like I said before, you’re going to remember them. They were an important part of your life, and hopefully, you learned more about life and yourself through that experience. You can’t live in the past, but you can be thankful for the lessons learned—and choose to move forward in your life.

When I first started this blog, I often used to post a song at the end, and for this post, I believe it will be especially fitting.

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” – Pslams 147:3 

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Twenty-Six

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Day Twenty-Six: Write About Someone You Really Care About

Friends are the siblings God never gave us – Mencius

I’m blessed to be able to say that I have a lot of people in my life that I really care about. Many of them, can be described as friends.

I didn’t grow up with siblings to hang out with, but I can honestly say that my friends are like the brothers and sisters I never had. Some of them, I’ve known for years—since middle school, even. Others, are newer friends. Hopefully, all of them will stick around for years to come.

For me, my friends have been the people who have seen me during my best and worst times. Together, we’ve gone through crushes and heartbreak, successes and failures, and from zits to clear skin. I can also say that I’m blessed to have a very mixed group of friends—some guys and some girls, some introverts and some extraverts, some like me and some as different from me as possible. But, each one of them has made a mark on my life and helped shape me into the person that I am today. 

To me, true friendship is an extension of family. It’s staying up late when a friend has a problem, even if you’re really tired and want to go to sleep. It’s staying together even when you disagree, or when they drive you absolutely crazy. It’s praying for each other, laughing together, and vowing to be the insane old ladies hanging out together in a nursing home someday.

In my view, friendship is forever, and ideally, beyond if they share your faith. 

Things change in our lives, but I believe that if both parties work at it, friendship doesn’t have to end—especially when social media makes it so easy to keep in touch for years on end. Boyfriends and girlfriends come and go, college starts and eventually finishes, and most people go through various jobs, but I believe that if we truly see our friends as family, those ties don’t have to fade away. Too often, friendship is seen as something disposable nowadays, when it should be seen as something permanent, the way David and Jonathan saw friendship (1 Samuel 18:1-5), Ruth and Naomi saw friendship (Ruth 1:16-18), and Jesus seemed to view friendship, based on the closeness He had with His disciples.

Let us always strive for these kinds of friendships.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Twenty-Three

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Day Twenty-Three: A Book I’d Recommend 

As I’ve mentioned before on this blog, I’m a huge bookworm. I love reading to see stories unfold and learn new things. Some of my favorite authors range from Karen Kingsbury, to Neta Jackson, to Charles Dickens, to Emily P. Freeman. I love seeing characters come to life and getting the opportunity to live a thousand lives all from my small, humble bedroom. Nonetheless, in the midst of all of the books that I love, there’s one that stands out in particular.

The Bible. 

Topping bestselling charts, the Bible is a piece of literary art. But, it’s so much more than that. It’s God’s written Word—and an account of His faithfulness in so many lives throughout decades of time. It’s His promise and a portrait of grace—promising Salvation to all who believe it and follow it. Mixing history, with poetry, with God’s words—I think even a skeptic would have to admit that it’s one of the most dynamic books of all time. 

It also contains all of the elements of a great story—even though it’s a recording of real events. It has action, with Paul’s dangerous missions across the world. It has romance, with Ruth and Boaz. It has raw emotional honesty, as King David’s laments in the Pslams. And, it challenges the status quo, as Jesus reaches out to the most marginalized of His time, bringing hope and restoration.

It also contains literary elements, such as foreshadowing within the Old Testament laws. It’s clear to see with a little bit of study that the sacrificing of lambs was a symbol, one that the people of that time would later understand as they learned of Jesus’ death and resurrection. It also contains alteration, anthropomorphism, and apostrophe—elements commonly found in many great works of literature (I’m geeking out big time here, y’all!)

Most of all, the Bible is a love letter to humanity—professing God’s sacrificial love for each one of us and pleading to adopt us as His children into one big family of believers. God used hundreds of authors throughout history to write this book under His divine inspiration, and it is up to us to accept this call. It is up to us to read the greatest story of all times, written by the Author and Creator of each of our stories. 

The Bible is the book of my life. It’s the book I live with, the book I live by, the book I want to die by—N. T. Wright

 

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Twenty-Two

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Day Twenty-Tw0: What do you collect?

In all honestly, I don’t really collect much at this point of my life. When I was little, I collected rocks, and I’m pretty sure at one point, I collected buttons, but within the past few years, I’ve mostly stopped collecting things. But, there is one thing that I still collect.

Memories. 

As I’ve been searching for a job and procrastinating CLEP tests, this is something that I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. At this point in my life, I have both middle and high school behind me—two stages of life that I believe a person grows the most—which has given me a chance to do a lot of reflecting. What has shaped the person I’ve become? What made me who I am today? How is my past shaping my present and future even as I write?

Recently, I read a book by bestselling author, Karen Kingsbury, called Remember. In short, the theme of this book was how our memories shape us, and how our pasts help us move into the future. Remembering how God has walked with me through tough transitions in the past gives me faith for the future—faith that in the midst of the confusing college years, God will work everything out in the end. 

God has been faithful to me throughout my life. He brought me from an insecure preteen to a confident young adult, and from an experience that jaded my faith to a freshly ignited faith. He’s brought me this far, and I know that He has more planned for me.

Growing up is never easy. Oftentimes, it seems that once we figure out one stage of life, it’s time for us to move on to the next. Just as I was starting to get a grip on being in middle school, it was time for me to move to high school. Likewise, just as I was figuring out how to be a high schooler, I graduated and moved onto college. Change is inevitable, but holding onto memories, while learning into the moment, can help us remember God’s faithfulness. 

No stage of life is too big for God. Like the lyrics to the old Britt Nicole song, All This Time, God has been walking with us throughout our whole life. He has never left us and He never will leave us.

All this time, from the first tear cried, to today’s sunrise, God was there. He was always there…He’s been walking with us all this time. 

If we remember this truth, we can get through anything.

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[a]
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[b] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:31-39

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Twenty-One

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Day Twenty-One: My Cell Phone 

Like most millennials, I’m the bona-fide owner of a smart phone. Also like many people, I have a tendency to look at it way too often!

It can be so easy to retreat to our phones sometimes—between games, apps like Instagram, and the luxury of escaping awkward social situations, it can be hard not to develop a slight phone addiction. It can also provide the comfort of being able to contact friends at any given time, through texting and social media. Nonetheless, one thing that I’ve found is it can also be a distraction from the world around us. Far too frequently, I find myself looking at my phone when I should be engaging with the world around me. 

Cell phones aren’t a bad thing. They provide us with many great things that would have been unthinkable just a couple of decades ago. I remember back in the early 2000s when cell phones were barely a thing—during the times when they flipped up and could barely be used to text. The joys of being a nineties child!

Like most things, cell phones were meant to be used in moderation. I believe that like with everything else, God wants us to steward our use of technology. Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” With technology at our fingertips, we have so many choices on how to use it. Will we use our spare minute to read a quick devotional or read angry twitter wars? Will we use our minutes on Facebook to rant or say something that may actually be productive? With so many choices, it’s important that we use our time wisely.

To put it shortly, What Would Jesus Search? 

Time is the most precious gift you have because you only have a set amount of it—Rick Warren 

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Twenty

Courtney2 Comments

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Day Twenty: Describe the best day of your life to date

Truth be told, I’ve had a lot of really good days in my life. I can remember clearly days that I first met the friends I have now, accomplished dreams, and faced fears. Nonetheless, the greatest day of my life—the day that many of my good days have hinged on—is the day that accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior.

I was young-ish when it happened—past the age of Veggie Tales but too young to have any major mistakes or regrets in my past. I was eleven years old and I was reading a tween series called The Ponytail Girls (Each book came with a free scrunchie!) and at one point in the book, it talked about accepting Jesus into your heart. By this point, I had been going to church with my mom for about two years and was beginning to learn a good deal about the Bible. I knew that I wanted Jesus, so I kneeled down on my bathroom floor, and prayed the prayer.

This was my come-to-Jesus-moment—with a teeny-bopper book and a  shower right next to me. No joke. 

Considering the seemingly ordinary nature of the moment, it may seem strange to some that I would point to that day as my greatest. Nonetheless, I believe that many of our stories have small beginnings. The decision to accept Christ was the start of my journey as a Christian, washed in the blood of Jesus. It was my way of saying that I’m all in—if having Jesus in my heart was the way to have Him walk with me through my days, than accepting Jesus into my heart was what I was going to do.  

That moment was the start of one of the greatest adventures of my life. I have the peace of knowing that God holds my future and that He has a plan. I’ve had a sense of stability through some of life’s hardest moments—from heartbreaks to friendship drama. Most of all, I have the assurance of eternal life with my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

If you’re reading this and have never made the decision to accept Christ, than I strongly urge you to do so. All you have to do is confess that your a sinner in need of a Savior, ask for forgiveness, and accept His grace. 

You may just look back on it as the best day of your life. 

Thirty Day Blogging Challenge #2: Day Nineteen

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Day Nineteen: If you could spend fifteen minutes with any celebrity, who would it be and why

I’ll be honest, when I first starting thinking about this challenge, I had no idea how I was going to approach it. I have a couple of celebrities who I like and admire, and just a few short hours ago, I was planning to either write about Britt Nicole or Tim Tebow (Both awesome people, right?). Nonetheless, just now, God revealed to me who it is that I would most like to meet and who I would like to talk about in this post.

Jesus. 

If I could spend fifteen minutes with literally any person, I would spend that time talking to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Could you imagine what it would be like, getting to talk to Jesus Christ—in flesh and actually have a conversation? To me, that would be a dream come true.

There are so many things I’d ask HIm. I’d ask about my life. I’d ask about my family line, and those who came before me. I’d ask about my future, and my past—all those I’ve encountered over my years on earth. I’d ask what it was like, coming to earth as God in flesh, and living His life, knowing that He’d die in the worst possible way.

 Most of all, I’d stand in awe of Him. I’d stand taken back by the fact that He created the world, and knows each of us by name. How He created everything from nothing, and how He’s written each of our stories before we were born. I’d thank Him for all He’s blessed me with—my family, my friends, my life. It would be an experience too overwhelming to even write about.

The lyrics to the old song by MercyMe, I Can Only Imagine, sum it up best.

Surrounded by your glory

What will my heart feel

Will I dance for you Jesus 

Or in awe of you will I be still?

Will I stand in your presence 

Or to my knees will I fall?

Will I sing Hallelujah?

Will I be able to speak at all? 

I can only imagine

I can only imagine…

How about you—if you had the chance to spend fifteen minutes with Jesus, what would you ask Him? What would you say? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below! 

Some Musings in Joseph’s Shoes

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Note: The story below is in no way intended to be an addition of or distortion of the nativity account written in Scripture. This is not meant to be an exact, academic account of Joseph thoughts and feelings—this is simply written as a journal entry of what Joseph may have been feeling and thinking in light of the facts we are given in the Gospels and historical documents. Please do not take this as anything other than speculation as to what it may have been like to be in Joseph’s shoes.

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I can barely believe all that’s been going on lately. It all seems surreal, like something that would happen to some other guy. I knew it was supposed to happen someday—I studied it throughout my schooling, after all—but to me? A simple carpenter, engaged to a nice local girl? 

At first, when she told me, it felt as if someone had stuck a dagger through my chest. “It’s God’s baby.” she had told me. “An angel visited me and told me I would give birth to the Son of Man.” Now, I’ve never been one to doubt God, but this sound a little far fetched—even to me. My initial thought was that she’s been sleeping around, even though she’s never seemed like the type of girl to do such a thing. After all, Mary’s as pure as snow. She would never do something like that—not Mary. 

I knew Mary was a good person, but what was I supposed to think? Even more pressing, what was I supposed to do? I didn’t want her to be stoned—I didn’t want anything to happen to her. I love her—I have even before the marriage was arranged. She had a beautiful heart, I couldn’t be more lucky to be set up with someone like her. 

“What would our life look like together?” I wondered. Holding our heads down as we received dirty looks from the townspeople? Having to desperately try to explain to my friends that we did nothing wrong? Constantly being object of suspicion among the townspeople? I thought that the best thing for both of us would be to divorce her quietly, and draw the least possible amount of suspicion and attention as possible. That is, until I was visited by an angel last night, confirming that everything Mary had said was true. 

Mary was pregnant with the Child prophesied about in Scripture. 

She was telling the truth all along. 

I knew the road ahead would be hard, but after that sign from God, I knew what I had to do. I had to marry her—and be the best father I could be to this Child.

This blessing to us and the world.

Out of every couple throughout the course of history, we were the ones God picked to raise the Savior. I may have no idea what I’m doing—I’ve never been a husband or a father, after all, but I know that Mary and I will figure this out together. We’ll figure it all out together, because we’re a team. From this day forward, Mary and I are going to face the biggest challenge two people could face. 

Raising God’s child through the power of God and for the glory of God. 

As hard as it will be, I knew deep down that there was no greater honor. 

And I’m going to do this thing right.

No matter what the cost. 

 

Some Musings In Mary’s Shoe’s

Courtney8 Comments

Note: The story below is in no way intended to be an addition of or distortion of the nativity account written in Scripture. This is not meant to be an exact, academic account of Mary’s thoughts and feelings—this is simply written as a journal entry of what Mary may have been feeling and thinking in light of the facts we are given in the Gospels and historical documents. Please do not take this as anything other than speculation as to what it may have been like to be in Mary’s shoes. 

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I may not have believed it – if I hadn’t seen it so vividly with own eyes. I would say that this is the kind of thing one might expect from a dream, except I’m not sure even a dream could cover the absurdity of this situation. If I told any of my friends, I’m pretty sure they’d think I’ve lost it – and that’s the best-case-scenario.

I mean, virgins don’t get pregnant. They just don’t. And they certainly don’t get pregnant with the Awaited One —the man my entire country has waited centuries for. Why would God choose me of all of the girls in the world to carry His Son? What makes Him think that I’m fit for something so great? 

I’m just your average girl on the brink of adulthood (But don’t get me started on that). I laugh too loud when I’m nervous and sometimes I cry from joy rather than sadness. I grew up in a humble little town where literally nothing ever happens and I’ve had the same neighbors since birth.  Nazareth isn’t a place that’s big or flashy or important, it’s a small town — a town where everyone knows everyone else.* It’s not the kind of place that would bare someone so important. It’s not the kind of town where an ordinary girl becomes the mother to her Savior. 

Juse writing those words sends chills up my spine. Somehow, writing things like this down make them seem more real, more concrete. This is really happening — I’m really going to become pregnant with a child who is, as the angel put it, “The Son of God”*. 

I want to be happy about this — I really do. I am for the most part. But the other part of me is scared, terrified even. How will my parents react to this—their clean-cut daughter becoming pregnant without being married? How will my friends react—will they even talk to me any more? And what about Joseph? He’s bound to think that I’ve been unfaithful, there’s no other way of interpreting this kind of thing. I know I did nothing wrong, but I’m not sure anyone else will believe me. There’s a very real chance that I could even be killed for something like this. But even if that doesn’t happen, the public shame that’s certain to come will be a certain death in itself. Just yesterday, the only big event that I had in my near future  was the upcoming wedding. Now, not only will I soon be a wife, I’ll be a mom too. 

It’s all just happening so fast. I like Joseph, I really do! He’s a great guy who lives his whole life for the Lord. He’s a hard worker and a kind, sensitive soul. But I just wish there was a little more time – more of a chance to get to know him before marrying him. 

There’s so much I wish he knew about me. Like, how I draw in the sand to make sense of life around me. Or how sometimes, once everyone has gone to sleep, I climb up the old olive tree outside my house and wonder what’s out there, outside of my hometown. Or how often, when I’m tending to the animals, I wonder how aware they are of life around them.

And I want to know about him too – what he does when he’s not studying or working with his father…where he sees our life going in the future…what his favorite pastime is..the secrets that he’s never told anyone. I just feel like you should know these things about a person who you know is going to be so significant in your life. 

I wish I could talk to him about these sort of things, but I have a feeling that he wouldn’t understand. Joseph has always been quick to accept others’ expectations of him. He’s responsible, level headed, and never seems to to be jilted by anything. Well, up until now, that is. How he’ll respond to this situation is anyone’s guess. 

This pregnancy is about to change everything. My life will never look the same again. Never again will I be a young child—I’m about to have a child. But, do you want to know the craziest thing about all of this? Somewhere, deep down, I still have a certain peace. If everything is as the angel says it is, than the Lord is with me in very real way. He has His hand on this and what’s about to happen is all for His glory. It’s about Him. 

It always has been. 

It always will be. 

*Luke 1:32 

*www.jesus-story.net 

 

 

 

What Are You Chasing?

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“What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?” – Mark 8:36 

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What are you chasing? The answer to this question is different for everyone. For some, it may be a better job, or any job at all. For others, it may a relationship—either romantic or platonic. Still for others, it may be a dream or goal you have yet to achieve.

What are you chasing? 

The truth is, we’re all chasing something. The thing that we’re chasing is often the thing that we tend to obsess the most over—the thing that takes up our thought space in our free moments. It is often accompanied by thoughts such as “I’ll be happy when…” or “This will be my moment…” No one is immune to this chase, because deep down inside, something tells us that we were born for it—we were born to pursue. We weren’t meant to stay stagnant. 

This pursuit is not a bad thing, but it can become a bad thing when focus more on the things of this world than the things of God. It can be such an easy trap to fall into that most of us don’t even realize we’re doing it. Truth be told, I struggle with this on a nearly daily basis. I’ve written in previous posts that I struggle in a big way with OCD and perfectionism and often those tend to be the driving forces in my chase.

I’ll analyze something that I’ve completed over and over again to the point of insanity. I’ll make a long and detailed bucket list that I absolutely must complete before I die. I’ll set up grand, exciting goals for myself and worry whether they’ll ever actually happen at all.

Again, I’ll clarify, having dreams is not a bad thing. Desiring to be in a relationship or have a family is not bad. Hoping to get a good position at a job is not bad. They only become bad when they take the place that only Jesus should have and become an idol. God wants to give you the desires of your heart, but first He wants to become the desire of your heart. Matthew 6:33 says “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” We are called to seek God before we seek anything else we desire.

Here are some points to remember as we go throughout our week and strive to put God first.

  1. It’s not about you – Recently, God has convicted me that I have unintentionally made my aspirations about me. The ironic part about all of this is, many of my goals pertain to ministry—things that are supposed to further His kingdom and reach people for Christ.  Nonetheless, I’ve somehow managed to turn these callings into what ‘I’m’ going to do.’ I’m’ going to change the world. ‘I’m’ was going to leave my mark. I’ve made God’s callings about me rather than God, and I repent of that. Sometimes, we can make ministry and outreach the focus, rather than an outpouring of the One who should be our focus.
  2. Everything but Christ will someday fade – Moments don’t last forever. Someday, that goal that you’re working so hard for will only be a past memory. Someday, that wedding day celebration that you’re planning on Pinterest will only be a photo in an album. Someday, that glamorous job will loose some of that excitement it once had. The only thing we can chase that will never fade away is Christ, Who is outside of space and time. 
  3. Let Go And Let God – I know, this saying is beyond cliche—but it’s true. In the words of a recent Jason Gray song “You can’t add a single day by worrying…You can’t change a single thing by freaking out, It’s just gonna close you in, Oh don’t let the trouble win.” God is going to do things in His timing, which is often different than our timing. There have been many times in my own life where I’ve wanted something to happen right. this. instant. Usually, in those situations, God tells me to wait. I’ve found that when I listen, and wait on His timing, it’s always for the best.

How about you? What are some things you’ve been chasing? I’d love to hear your thoughts and stories in the comments section!