Note: This is not the “best” vacation that I have ever had, but it was by far the most interesting. For your entertainment, I have decided to write about this particular vacation. 

It was between sophomore and junior year. I had high expectations.

My family and I had made plans to go to Tennessee and stay at my grandparents mountain house for a vacation. All of my cousins were going as well, and we were all going to stay in one house together. Prior to this trip, I had seen a couple of movies about country towns. I was ready to visit a nice little neighborhood like the one in the film Sweet Home Alabama! Little did I know, mountain houses and small towns are worlds apart.

We left extremely early in the morning, and made the entire distance by car. It was my very first road trip, complete with a Leanne Rimes CD that we replayed a fair number of times. The trip started out exciting, but soon lost momentum after the first five or six hours in a car…

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, we arrived in the mountains of Tennessee. As we drove up the mountains, I was confronted head-on with my fear of heights…right below us were rocks that could fatally destroy us if we fell upon them. Thankfully, we made it up the mountain safe and sound and lived to tell the story of what would end up being a very interesting trip.

We arrived at my grandparents house around 5:00. By then, we were all pretty worn out from the trip, but our family kept us on our feet. My cousins (ranging in age from three to twelve) showed me around the property, and within the first hour there, we ran into a slight problem…WASPS! 

We stumbled upon a nest, and like a plague straight out of Exodus, we were chased by wasps! I grabbed one of my youngest cousins’ hand and instructed all of my cousins to run, feeling responsible as the oldest. Unfortunately, two of my cousins got stung anyway.

Now, one thing that you need to know about this place is that there was no hospital (Or civilization) for a good hour or two. We were in no-man’s-land. Thus, we relied solely on the allergy medicine in my mom’s purse and the limited first aid kit owned by our family. No one was too badly hurt, but their bites both swelled up frighteningly large.

Finally, after all of the chaos had calmed down, and after my cousins were feeling better, we sat down in front of the TV and watched some movie on Disney Channel. It was only the first day and I was already exhausted. I knew that with danger lurking around the corner, I had to watch my back (And watch my cousins, too).

That night, I planned to watch some television on my own after everyone had gone to bed. I brought my computer and my earbuds, but soon found out that the house had no wifi! Absolutely none! That meant that for three days, I couldn’t watch go on youtube, check my emails, or surf the web! We couldn’t even text or use cell phones! 

Thus, I went on a wifi fast for the next three days. On day two of the trip, my family decided to go into town for the day to look at some of the shops. After all, what could possibly go wrong?

Well, as it turned out the town that we had stumbled upon enjoys having parades in the middle of the road. A Fourth of July parade blocked the main road that we needed to drive through to get to the shops. I have never seen anything like this in my life. A parade blocking a main road? This simply does not happen in the suburbs!

Finally, we managed to find a way around the parade and somehow, found our way to the shops! I was very happy to be in civilization again. I discovered on that vacation that the middle-of-nowhere is not my cup of tea.

The trip to the shops went fairly well. Nothing too crazy happened there. Although about halfway through, I realized that I wasn’t feeling well. After a couple more hours of hanging with my cousins, I knew I needed to retire to a bed and lie down. I was starting to get symptoms of the flu. I was shaky, I had a stomachache, and I felt completely and utterly exhausted. Thus, I crashed front of a small portable car-ride-TV that my family had brought to binge-watch The Middle.

Even though it was Forth of July, the weather was freezing! I slept in a winter parka that night to keep warm, overtop of a long-sleeve shirt! Though we were in Tennessee, it felt a lot like Antarctica. It was by far the weirdest weather that I have ever experienced on Fourth of July.

The next morning, our trip to the mountains came to a close. We ate breakfast, said goodbye to our family, and headed home. And, I soon found that a home complete with wifi and neighbors close by is a happy home. 😃

*Note: For those of you reading this who don’t live in America, it isn’t all as crazy as the town depicted in this post.